Your Life Gears

Dear human being,

I would like to introduce you to your most important “life gears”. What do I mean by “life gears”? I imagine those life gears as important components inside you. You cannot see them, yet they are there inside you, working hard all the time to shape your life.  Every human being has a belief system or set of beliefs (gear one) that control his/her life. The movement of that gear directs your thoughts (gear two) and emotions (gear three) in a certain way. Take a moment to look at your life now to better understand that concept. Let’s take a quick and simple example to demonstrate the attached diagram.

Do you believe that stress leads to achievements? Cause lots of people think that they need to be pressured and pushed to get things done. Some people think that they cannot work without deadlines. If you have such a belief embedded in your belief system, I’d be tempted to ask you couple of questions. How would that belief affect your thoughts, in times of stress and in stress-free times? Do you know how to enjoy your holidays or short breaks? Do you really enjoy relaxing or you feel that it’s a waste of time with not much achievement? Be honest to yourself. Go deep inside. Capture your real hidden thoughts. Before going further, I invite you to write down your thoughts and answers to the above stated questions.

What have you noticed? Now let me ask you; how would your thoughts affect your emotions? Try to feel each of your written answers. Take your time. Do you feel down or up, negative or positive? I will not assume anything. I want you to explore your thoughts and feelings.

The most powerful tool for self-exploration and awareness is asking questions, so bear with me.

How do you see “stress”? Is it good or bad? Useful or harmful? Negative or positive? If you believe that stress is good, then enjoy it. If you believe that it’s bad, then proceed reading the following lines. We all agree that achievements are considered a good thing. Progress is human need. Who doesn’t want to achieve and progress? Then the following logical question would be; is it right to link a positive outcome “achievement” with a negative mean “stress”? Does it seem logical? Does it sound reasonable? Does it feel right?

If you realize that linking stress to achievement is irrational, then you need to do something about that. You need to substitute that irrational link with a rational one. Before asking how, ask why? Why do you need or must change that belief?

Is it important or not? Those are some critical questions you need to address.

Well, that’s a good start. What’s next? I recommend that you re-read this article. Take your time. Look closely at your answers. Zoom-in. You could also look for a better example that you would better relate to. Writing is a better way for deeper realizations than just thinking in the open wide space.

And remember your life gears shaping your life.

After realization come decisions and actions. May be it’s the right time for you to re-shape your life. Good luck.

Life Coach – Nayef Moukhtar

Inspiring Story - Everyone can play, even Shay!

Everyone can play At a fundraising dinner for an American school that serves learning disabled children,the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended.

After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: "When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?" The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. "I believe,that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes, in the way other people treat that child."Then he told the following story:

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked,"Do you think they'll let me play?" Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked if Shay could play, not expecting much. The boy looked around for guidance and said, "We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning." Shay struggled over to the team's bench put on a team shirt with a broad smile and his Father had a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart.

The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat. At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing the other team putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least be able to make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. The game would now be over, but the pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game. Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the head of the first baseman, out of reach of all team mates.

Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, "Shay, run to first! Run to first!" Never in his life had Shay ever ran that far but made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled. Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second!" Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to second base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball, the smallest guy on their team, who had a chance to be the hero for his team for the first time. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions and he too intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.
 
All were screaming, "Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay" Shay reached third base, the opposing shortstop ran to help him and turned him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third! Shay, run to third" As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams and those watching were on their feet were screaming,

"Shay, run home! Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the "grand slam" and won the game for his team.

That day, said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world. Shay didn't make it to another summer and died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy and coming home and seeing his mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!



Source: Rabbi Paysach Krohn, a popular lecturer and best-selling author of the ArtScroll Maggid series of short stories (www.rogerdarlington.me.uk)

Attention: Your Comfort Zone is NOT a Safe Place !

Do you think you can stay safe in your comfort zone? Till when?

The answer is "No" .. It won't last forever .. Trust me and don't deceive yourself .. please ..

[Don't think that you can avoid "change". "Change" happens and will happen whether you like it or not.]
The game is to MAKE "change" by yourself and not to wait and react when it hits you. The game is to move towards it instead of running or walking away from it. Some people might think that "change" is linked to risk, while reality says that staying still in your place (your comfort zone) without making "change" is the real risk.

Avoid risk by deciding to change. It feels good. You will enjoy it because you will surely feel ALIVE.
It only takes a simple decision and a professional life coach.
You are two steps close to it.
So "just do it"

You have one of two choices and it's up to you:

1) stay in your comfort zone, try to avoid change, talk excuses and enjoy some secondary gain whether consciously or not (we'll talk about secondary gains in a later post, or you can search it:).

Results:
Waste of time (years) and all your precious resources
Frequent depression and negative state
Postponing your success
Sacrificing excellence
Etc.
And then, guess what, change will happen !!!
But in this case, it will be;
- Sudden
- Dramatic/ Drastic
- Obligatory
- Comprises some major sacrifices

2) decide to avoid risk by getting out of your comfort zone, detect early signals for change, before reaching the edge where you don't have choices.

Results:
Opposite to the above mentioned results, and you can easily add more.

Change will be:
- Gradual
- Modest
- Chosen
- Might comprise some minor sacrifices (might not)


So, you have the choice, and honestly it's up to you.
I will repeat my message again ...
Avoid risk by deciding to change. It feels good. You will enjoy it because you will surely feel ALIVE.
It only takes a simple decision and a professional life coach.
You are two steps closer
So "just do it"

I can help - if you wish (sorry .. if you decide)



Nayef Moukhtar
Cairo
24-04-2012

MY LIFE OATH : AS LONG AS I AM ALIVE

Today I would like to share with you my "Life Oath" ;)

Insha'Allah (God willing)

As long as I'm alive ...

I will follow my dream

I will never give up

I will try over and over and over

I will be flexible

I will be committed

I will change my approach as needed

I will enhance my skills

I will stretch my capabilities

I will use all available resources (internal and external)

I will find my way

I will refuse to accept defeat

I will not regret or blame (myself or others)

I will always believe in myself

I will take control of my life

I will face challenges and will take decisions

I will take actions

I will learn

I will work hard

I will enjoy the journey

I will reach my goals

I will succeed

Simply because I trust Allah, and then I trust myself.

Signature: Nayef Moukhtar

I would highly appreciate if you share yours with me :)